Green Book

[From April]

Green has been one of my favorite colors for most of my life, but it sometimes fades into the background. When spring comes, I celebrate the return of green and all of the feelings that are associated with that color, and that's one of my favorite parts of the year. It's weird the way that we humans can adapt to the lack or the presence of something and start to forget about what life was like with(out) them. One of those things is green.

Green brings so much energy into my life that the winter sucked away without me even noticing. I find myself wanting to be outside as much as possible, and my photos have color again. I feel new, refreshed, and ready to be active again. There's something different in the air when everything is green, and the general mood of the environment and people is more light-hearted and at ease. Winter can be so uncomfortable, but spring brings comfort and peace.

Sometimes, the green can be overwhelming, and it can bring with it negative feelings such as envy and jealousy and nostalgia for a time when I could hide from the light. But this is a season of stepping into the light and intentionally growing whether painful not.

Green in spring is different than green in summer. Green in spring is peaceful, new, and not aggressive. The cooler air makes it all more bearable and rewarding. This green allows me to appreciate all the good that green can be. I can experience—life, health, nature, growth, balance, and harmony.

I think the first place that I start to notice the green is in the grass. The grass is no longer brown, dead, and lacking color—clover begins to grow and cover the dead patches, bringing with it hope, luck, and festivities like St. Patrick's Day. I then begin to notice the green in the buds on the trees, waiting to open and bloom and add beauty to the grey surroundings. About a week later, I'll notice that every tree that was bare or sparse is now fully covered by new and beautiful green leaves. There is so much to learn by observing nature in this season.

I want to observe the green in nature and do the same. I want to bloom, I want to grow. I want to move toward the light without fear or hesitation. I want to put myself out there for people to see and notice the growth in my life. (I should also probably drink more water). I've taken a lot of steps in the right direction, and spring is reminding me that I am on the right track. I hope I can continue to stay green in all seasons, but especially in this season where it is so easy and necessary to thrive.

Sometimes I get mad at myself because I'm not taking the time to intentionally grow like I should, but I know that I am still growing, and I'm learning to be green rather than too blue. I love the sun, but I also love the rain. I need reminders of each season in every season because they are all valuable to a healthy and happy life.

Seasons

Seasons come and go, and some are always going to be more challenging than others. Summer and winter always feel longer than fall and spring, and that's because they kind of are? To me, summer is for sure the longest. When I was younger and the end of summer meant going back to school, I thought summer was always too short. I guess I wasn't old enough to enjoy the other seasons that I lived through. The only thing on my mind was fun and playing outside and enjoying the freedom from a schedule. I've grown up, and I don't think in that way anymore.

The first summer post-grad is hard for all of its own reasons (leaving friends—trying to find a job—moving—adjusting), but it also brings a freedom and lack of structure for the first time that I desperately wish I could hold onto for a little bit longer. Dreams don't have to come true right away, but for some, they do, and I should be celebrating for / with them, waiting my turn. Summer is endless this time around, so maybe by the time that things start to change and the gradient is restored, I'll take a step towards my own dream.

My dreams are not your dreams.

My dreams are not your dreams.

My dreams are not your dreams.

My dreams are not your dreams.

This summer for me has been a lot of learning and adjusting in ways I didn't expect to be adjusting. I expected that life in general and the job search were going to be much easier than they actually have been, because it's always been like that for me somehow. It's been hard to represent myself on one piece of paper, and it's disheartening when some people won't even get to see that part of me. Persistence has been the key.

While I try to appear perfect and like I'm holding it all together, things start to get heavy. It feels like I'm carrying giant loads all on my own. I know that this is not actually the case, but some days I forget that's it's okay and relatively easy to ask for help—or the help is already there. Sometimes, all it takes is making your needs known. This past week, I've received so much encouragement and leads to my next steps, and I'm beyond thankful for the people that have been there to help me.

These images were inspired by the thoughts above.

Marah - Impromptu Backyard Session

I've been wanting to share my photo work on my website, but I haven't yet found the best way to do that yet, so until then, I'll be blogging photography sessions. This photo shoot with Marah seems like a great way to kick this off.

Marah is a blogger/photographer/artist/shoe collector/human and so much more living in Atlanta. I had been waiting a while to be able to meet her, and this past weekend, we were able to meet. She has an excellent eye for style, and I'm glad that I was able to meet her and that we were able to take photos together.

I was visiting Kentucky to shoot a wedding over Memorial Day weekend, and Marah was doing the same thing. Our families have both lived in Kentucky, and it turned out that we were going to be in the same city at the same time, so we had to make it happen. Our families met for lunch (shoutout to Brynne and Aidan [our siblings are dating each other]) in downtown Scottsville, Kentucky, and then we traveled back to Marah's home and relaxed on the back porch. We talked about the struggles of being in a creative field, and we took some impromptu photos in her parents' backyard.

These images were super fun, and I've been in a very black and white mood lately, so here are the photos.